February 11th, 2010
Do you know where your buttons are?
You need to know what makes you jump. You need to know what makes you react unprofessionally, and then you need to know how to keep your cool when one of those buttons are pushed.
I tested myself this weekend with my teenaged daughter. For those of you who have teenagers, I’m sure you’ll agree that at times they absolutely fall into the “difficult people” category.
Victoria tried several times on Sunday to push my buttons. She wanted to fight, and was getting very frustrated when I did not react the way she wanted me to.
That in itself was worth it. She did however, manage to get under my skin, and I too, was frustrated. I just didn’t give the reaction I normally give. I did respond though.
A response is the thought-out version of a reaction. I responded, meaning I didn’t ignore her; I didn’t let her get what she wanted (a fight). I kept my cool, held firm, but didn’t allow her to push my buttons.
That felt nice for me.
That frustrated her.
That felt nice for me!
It isn’t about winning and losing, but it is about doing the right thing at the right time with your difficult person. I did the right thing by not letting Victoria push my buttons. Can you do that today?
Tags: confrontation, consistent, dealing with difficult people, detach, difficult, difficult people, easy solution, emotion, Emotions, Keeping cool, negative family, reaction, solution, strategy, taming emotions, trigger