Doesn’t it drive you around the bend when someone tells you to calm down? That is about the worst thing you could possibly say to a person who has lost their cool. So don’t say it. Ever.
I can appreciate that sometimes people get out of hand. I can appreciate that in order for us to proceed they are going to need to calm down. However, telling them to calm down is like throwing grease on the fire – it will just cause a big blow up.
Instead of telling the other person to calm down, perhaps we need to say “I need to take a breather before we continue. Perhaps we could continue this conversation in 45 minutes.”
I realize that when you are dealing with a client that option is not always available and you must deal with the situation immediately. Continue to speak calmly and with extra care – but don’t tell the other person to calm down!
Keep your own cool, and remind yourself to calm down – but don’t give that advice to an angry and difficult person. It will make matters much worse. Breathe deeply …. But bite your tongue!
Our next webinar on Confrontation Skills will be May 25th at 2:00pm EDT. To register, email Caroline@on-the-right-track.com with “Register Me for Confrontation Skills” in the subject line. Only $99 for unlimited attendance (per line) complete with 30 days of free coaching. You can’t beat that value!