Archive for June, 2009

This is just about you

Monday, June 22nd, 2009

Don’t bring others into your confrontations/conversations.  It doesn’t matter that you aren’t the only one who feels this way, or that others agree with you.

Confrontation (and conversations about difficult situations) are between you and your difficult person only.

If you say “Julie feels the same way” then you have guaranteed to derail the conversation to no longer be about the issue, but about that Julie and others feel that way as well.  Your difficult person will become fixated on Julie and others instead of the issue at hand.

Besides, you have potentially created a disaster for Julie as well.

Learn to deal professionally with your difficult person at our next teleseminar on July 29th at 2pm EDT.  Only one hour for $99 which includes unlimited attendance (per line), an executive overview prior to the session, 30 days of no cost coaching, support and advice, a toll free number and a recording of your session.

Sign up today at http://dealingwithdifficultpeople.org/register.php or email Caroline@on-the-right-track.com with Register Me in the subject line.

Keep on-the-right-track this week!

Scars last forever

Monday, June 15th, 2009

Forgive; sounds good

Forget; I don’t think I could

They say time heals everything, I’m still waiting.

Those are the lyrics to one of my favourite songs by the Dixie Chicks, and they directly apply to dealing with difficult people.

If you have someone who truly is a diffiult person, and if you have one of those “dreaded” confrontations, there is likely to be some type of scar.  Perhaps it will scare you away from confrontation in the future, perhaps it will make you jump faster when someone crosses the line the next time.  Whatever the result, dealing with difficult people and confrontations will leave it’s mark on you.

Make sure you are prepared before you have your confrontation.  Make sure you are prepared before you say anything.  This means to plan what you are going to say instead of relying on your instinct to say the right thing (that is not likely to happen).  Make an appointment, schedule a time to talk, but avoid saying what is on your mind as it is happening (bite your tongue!).

You may be able to forgive, you may not be able to forget, but it is up to you what you say, how you say it, and when you say it.  Take control so that you can heal from the situation.

If you need to learn exactly what to say, how to say it and when to say it, perhaps you need to attend next weeks teleseminar on Confrontation Skills.

Monday June 22, 2009 @ 2pm EDT (Toronto, NYC time zone)
60 minutes
Executive Overview sent prior to session
MP3 download for continued learning
30 days free coaching to ensure you are on-the-right-track to success!

Only $99 per dial in line (unlimited attendance).

Email Caroline@on-the-right-track.com or go directly to
http://dealingwithdifficultpeople.org/register.php
Looking forward to helping you minimize your scars.

Is there a lot of conflict in your office?

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

According to Your Workplace magazine (June 2009) in a study of 5,00 full-time employees in Europe and the Americas found that only 12% of them had received formal training in conflict management.

The three work sectors where frequent conflict is most common is government (42.7%), eduation (41.8%) and not-for-profit (41.3%)

What are you doing to ensure you are part of the solution and not part of the problem?

Are you reading these weekly tips and then not doing anything with them?  When was the last time you actively ensured that you were resolving conflict and not just ignoring it?

Ensure you are ON THE RIGHT TRACK to conflict resolution!  Build your skills by re-reading some of our past tips, have a look in the mirror and truly reflect on what you’ve been doing to fix the problem, and register for our next session!

If you want to ensure that you are helping and not hurting, be sure to attend out next Confrontation Skills teleseminar.

Date:  Monday, June 22, 2009

Time:  2:00 pm EDT (NYC and Toronto time)

Length:  60 minutes

Cost: Only $99 per dial in line (unlimited attendance)

You will receive a toll free phone number and dial in instructions along with an Executive Overview to follow along with.  There will be a Q&A session, as well each attendee will receive 30 days of complimentary consulting to help you deal individually with your difficult person and confrontation skills.  Finally you will receive an MP3 download of the session for continued (and shared) learning.

Email Caroline@on-the-right-track.com with “Reserve Me for Confrontation Skills” in the subject line to register.

What is the difference?

Monday, June 1st, 2009

We typically label anyone that is difficult as a difficult person.  The actual definition of a difficult person is:

Those people who continually and chronically get in your way of you doing your job and living your life effectively (Websters)

Statistically that is only about two percent of the population.  I realize that some days it feels like we meet about a month’s worth of two percent in one shot!

What most of us are actually experiencing is conflict.  According to Websters conflict is:

A state of being that occurs over a prolonged period during which issues are not addressed, thereby adding to dissonance.

Basically it is tension.

It might make it a little easier to decide if you are dealing with conflict/tension or if you are truly dealing with a difficult person.  Sometimes it makes it easier to separate from the problem by diagnosing it correctly.

Truly difficult people are rare, and it is easy to emotionally step back from the problem because it isn’t personal.  They are just like that.

Conflict is personal and we need to realize that we are typically part of the tension that is created.  Do something different to defuse some of the tension.

To defuse you can read through some of the past tips below, or you can sign up for either of our upcoming sessions.

June 22nd – 2pm EDT – Confrontation Skills
July 29 – 2pm EDT – Dealing with Difficult People

Sign up today to ensure you get on-the-right-track!


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